Funny Graduation Quotes
My father, who was from a wealthy family and highly educated, a lawyer, Yale and Columbia, walked out with the benefit of a healthy push from my mother, a seventh grade graduate, who took a typing course and got a secretarial job as fast as she could.-George Weinberg
My graduate studies were carried out at the California Institute of Technology.
-Kenneth G. Wilson
My main objective is to prepare candidates for professional baseball; however, the majority of our graduates will go home as much better qualified amateurs.
-Jim Evans
I graduated a the top of my class in the '84 Olympic Games; I won a gold medal.
-Scott Hamilton
I have actually five honorary degrees.
-Katherine Dunham
So in my uncertainty, I went to graduate school and there it all happened.
-Ted Nelson
Some go on to trade schools or get further training for jobs they are interested in. Some go into the arts, some are craftsmen, some take a little time out to travel, and some start their own businesses. But our graduates find and work at what they want to do.
-Daniel Greenberg
The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness.
-Robert M. Hutchins
The economy in the Valley will need to grow if students want to come back and work with their specialized degrees. We need to develop more to create more opportunities.
-Frank Murphy
The essays in The Great Taos Bank Robbery were my project to win a Master of Arts degree in English when I quit being a newspaper editor and went back to college.
-Tony Hillerman
The idea of winning a doctor's degree gradually assumed the aspect of a great moral struggle, and the moral fight possessed immense attraction for me.
-Elizabeth Blackwell
The knowledge of languages was very useful. I have a university degree in foreign languages and literature.
-Emma Bonino
This man used to go to school with his dog. Then they were separated. His dog graduated!
-Henny Youngman
We don't stop going to school when we graduate.
-Carol Burnett
We had times in '66 and '67 when we would pick up a platoon of privates out of the receiving barracks the week before we even graduated the platoon that we were on!
-R. Lee Ermey
When I graduated from Santa Monica High in 1927, I was voted the girl most likely to succeed. I didn't realize it would take so long.
-Gloria Stuart
Yale places great stress on undergraduate and graduate teaching. I like teaching, and I do a lot of it.
-James Tobin
Yeah, I spent about 20 years in a dorm room. It took me a while to graduate.
-Douglas Wilson
You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world.
-Tom Brokaw
When I was a graduate student, the leading spirits at Harvard were interested in the history of ideas.
-M. H. Abrams
When I was going for my graduate degree, I decided I was going to make a feature film as my thesis. That's what I was famous for-that I had my thesis film be a feature film, which was 'You're a Big Boy Now.'
-Francis Ford Coppola
ACT and SAT each have their own parts of the country. The GRE has its lock on graduate admissions. And so, one could blame the companies, but really, economically, they have no incentive to change things very much because they're getting the business.
-Robert Sternberg
At the School of Visual Arts in New York, you can get your degree in Net art, which is really a fantastic way of thinking of theater in new ways.
-Laurie Anderson
Being considerate of others will take your children further in life than any college degree.
-Marian Wright Edelman
Catholic school graduates exhibit a wide variety of qualities that will not only help them in their careers but also in their family and community lives.
-Joe Baca
College atheletes used to get a degree in bringing your pencil.
-Ruby Wax
Each year India and China produce four million graduates compared with just over 250,000 in Britain.
-Gordon Brown
Earlier today, Arnold Schwarzenegger criticized the California school system, calling it disastrous. Arnold says California's schools are so bad that its graduates are willing to vote for me.
-Conan O'Brien
Even though I didn't get a business degree, I enjoyed learning about economics.
-Herb Ritts
Even though I disagree with many of the changes, when I see the privates graduate at the end of the day, when they walk off that drill field at the end of the ceremony, they are still fine privates; outstanding, well motivated privates.
-R. Lee Ermey
Everybody wants you to do good things, but in a small town you pretty much graduate and get married. Mostly you marry, have children and go to their football games.
-Faith Hill
Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it's in Hamburger Technology.
-Clive James
For a man to attain to an eminent degree in learning costs him time, watching, hunger, nakedness, dizziness in the head, weakness in the stomach, and other inconveniences.
-Miguel de Cervantes
For students today, only 10 percent of children from working-class families graduate from college by the age of 24 as compared to 58 percent of upper-middle-class and wealthy families.
-Patrick J. Kennedy
God will not look you over for medals degrees or diplomas, but for scars.
-Elbert Hubbard
I didn't get my degree at NYU; I got it later, they gave me an honourary one.
-Jim Jarmusch
I don't look to find an educated person in the ranks of university graduates, necessarily. Some of the most educated people I know have never been near a university.
-John Keegan
I dropped out of school for a semester, transferred to another college, switched to an art major, graduated, got married, and for a while worked as a graphic designer.
-James Green Somerville
I first became interested in women and religion when I was one of the few women doing graduate work in Religious Studies at Yale University in the late 1960's.
-Carol P. Christ
I got all my work done to graduate in two months and then they were like, I'm sorry, you have to take driver's ed. I just kind of went, Oh, forget it.
-Fiona Apple
I went to college at the University of Kansas, where I got a degree in political science.
-Sara Paretsky
I went to military college in Canada and graduated as an officer in the Navy but also as an engineer.
-Marc Garneau
I wrote a novel for my degree, and I'm very happy I didn't submit that to a publisher. I sympathize with my professors who had to read it.
-David Eddings
I'm not impressed by someone's degree... I'm impressed by them making movies.
-Richard King
If a student takes the whole series of my folklore courses including the graduate seminars, he or she should learn something about fieldwork, something about bibliography, something about how to carry out library research, and something about how to publish that research.
-Alan Dundes
In 1858 I received the degree of D. S. from the Lawrence Scientific School, and thereafter remained on the rolls of the university as a resident graduate.
-Simon Newcomb
In my second year in graduate school, I took a computer course and that was like lightening striking.
-Ted Nelson
In the summer we graduated we flipped out completely, drinking beer, cruising in our cars and beating up each other. It was a crazy summer. That's when I started to be interested in girls.
-Ed O'Neill
In this outward and physical ceremony we attest once again to the inner and spiritual strength of our Nation. As my high school teacher, Miss Julia Coleman, used to say: 'We must adjust to changing times and still hold to unchanging principles.'
-Jimmy Carter
It is soooooo necessary to get the basic skills, because by the time you graduate, undergraduate or graduate, that field would have totally changed from your first day of school.
-Leigh Steinberg
It is virtually impossible to compete in today's global economy without a college degree.
-Bobby Scott
It makes little difference how many university courses or degrees a person may own. If he cannot use words to move an idea from one point to another, his education is incomplete.
-Norman Cousins
It might be said now that I have the best of both worlds. A Harvard education and a Yale degree.
-John F. Kennedy
Knowledge is invariably a matter of degree: you cannot put your finger upon even the simplest datum and say this we know.
-T. S. Eliot
Life is the most exciting opportunity we have. But we have one shot. You graduate from college once, and that's it. You're going out of that nest. And you have to find that courage that's deep, deep, deep in there. Every step of the way.
-Andrew Shue
My father was on the faculty in the Chemistry Department of Harvard University; my mother had one year of graduate work in physics before her marriage.
-Kenneth G. Wilson
I received my undergraduate degree in engineering in 1939 and a Master of Science degree in mathematical physics in 1941 at Steven Institute of Technology.
-Frederick Reines
I teach one semester a year, and this year I'm just teaching one course during that semester, a writing workshop for older students in their late 20s and early 30s, people in our graduate program who are already working on a manuscript and trying to bring it to completion.
-Tobias Wolff
I think I finally chose the graduate degree in engineering primarily because it only took one year and law school took three years, and I felt the pressure of being a little behind - although I was just 22.
-Daniel J. Evans
I think women as well as men are concerned about jobs and the economy and spending and, and other issues. They're concerned that when their kids graduate from college they have an economy and they have a future in this country and they, they have the same opportunity that we've had and our grandparents have had.
-Ken Buck
I think young writers should get other degrees first, social sciences, arts degrees or even business degrees. What you learn is research skills, a necessity because a lot of writing is about trying to find information.
-Irvine Welsh
Having a college degree gave me the opportunity to be... well-rounded. Also, the people I met at the university, most of them are still my colleagues now. People I've known for years are all in the industry together.
-Jon Secada
I always wanted to have my own album released before I graduated from high school.
-Christina Aguilera
I could be happy doing something like architecture. It would involve another couple of years of graduate school, but that's what I studied in college. That's what I always wanted to do.
-Parker Stevenson
I did get a degree in special education.
-Clay Aiken
I did graduate with a bachelor's degree in civil engineering in 1948.
-Daniel J. Evans
I have no problems with private schools. I graduated from one and so did my mother. Private schools are useful and we often use public funds to pay for their infrastructures and other common needs.
-Jim Clyburn
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.
-Fred Allen
A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.
-Robert Orben
Really, the potential for, first of all, any college graduate today is enormously good. These are good times for anyone with a college degree today, particularly African Americans. With a college degree today, you really breach the unemployment rate.
-Alexis Herman
Remember, half the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their class.
-Al McGuire
Follow Funny Quotes Today on Facebook and Twitter for the Quote of the day.