All in the Family Quotes

All in the Family Quotes

I just thank God I'm an atheist.
-Mike Stivic

Shut up, Meathead!
-Archie Bunker

Shush up, you!
-Archie

Gloria: Do you know that sixty percent of all deaths in America are caused by guns?
Archie Bunker: Would it make you feel any better, little girl, if they was pushed out of windows?
-Gloria, Archie

Stifle!
-Archie Bunker

Get away from me!
-Archie

Archie: Ohhh, swinging, is that what you's calls it?"
Swinger Man: "Yeah, what do you call it?"
Archie: "Communism!"
-Archie and Swinger

Edith, don't you read no more of those magazines!
-Archie

Archie: "If God had meant for white people to dance with colored people--
Mike: "He'd a given us rhythm too."
-Archie and Mike

Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
-Archie Bunker

Happy Days            Married With Children           Family Matters

YOU, GET OUT OF MY CHAIR'!!!!!
-Archie

God don't make no mistakes, that's how He got to be God.
-Archie

(Running to the front door) ARHCIE YOURE HOME!!!!!
-Edith

I am not pulling your fingers
-Archie

Like the Good Book says, "Let him who is without sin... be the rollin' stone."
-Archie

Hey its Uncle Polock
-Archie

Hey Edith get me a beer huh
-Archie

You are a Meathead
-Archie

Edith: What has four legs, and flys?
Archie Bunker: Two pairs of pants!
-Edith, Archie

On no the Dingbat is trying to sing
-Archie

I am not eatting food with Chink Pick up sticks
-Archie

I tell ya, Edith, when a plumber's business goes into the toilet you're sitting pretty.
-Archie

Now don't go telling Lionel! He'll get on his tom-tom and alert all the other jungle bunnies.
-Archie

You'd better start mixing toothpaste with your shampoo. You're getting a cavity in your brain.
-Archie

Edith Bunker: I'm home. I'm home, Archie.
Archie Bunker: Are you sure?
-Edith, Archie

Shut up you
-Archie

Stifle Stifle Stifle
-Edith

Hey Meathead why are you always eating my food?
-Archie

Edith Bunker: Don't ya like me bringin' home surprises?
Archie Bunker: Geez, Edith... with you a surprise could be anything from a runaway horse to a Puerto Rican.
-Edith, Archie

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