Gilmore Girls Quotes

Gilmore Girls Quotes

When you date a girl like Rory, you're involved with her whole family. Just like that last girl you dated, you were involved with her whole petri dish.

College is breaking my spirit. Every single day, telling me things I don't know. It's making me feel stupid.

I don't hate you. I can't hate the pathetic.

Are you going to kiss me now? You are so incredibly predictable.

School comes before mommy's mental health.

Give me a burger, onion rings, cheese fries, and a list of people who killed their parents and got away with it. I'm lookin' for some heroes.

Yeah, you do know honey that garbage doesn't actually talk at all unless it's on Sesame Street.

Oh, you know what? I have someone standing abnormally close to me right now. I'll call you later.

All right, I should go. I called Luke last night and he made me promise to get the truck back by two hours ago, so if I leave now it's sooner than I planned.

Women don't eat at all. They just look at food then jump on the treadmill.

Thank you. You know, my parents would love these sandwiches. I wish I could bring 'em by but unfortunately they're in private bible study right now.

Richard: Focus, please.
Lorelai: I am a camera.
-Richard, Lorelai

Lorelai: Stop saying 'mother' like that.
Rory: Like what?
Lorelai: Like there should be another word after it.
-Lorelai, Rory

Lorelai: You ruined my joke.
Rory: Um, no, the punchline ruined your joke.
-Lorelai, Rory

Paris: I'm not denying that we've got a May - December romance going on here.
Rory: This is not May - December. This is May - Ming Dynasty.
-Paris, Rory

Sookie: I will give it a 9.
Lorelai: 9+
Sookie: What will make it a 10?
Lorelai: Another half point.
-Sookie, Lorelai

Tom: I got your doors.
Lorelei: Tom, I'm loving you like a two dollar whore.
Tom: Terriffic I'll tell the wife.
-TOm, Lorelei

Luke: Is this how turkey legs are supposed to look?
Carrie: I don't know. Take off your pants and let us see.
-Luke, Carrie

Emily: We intend to leave here completely different people.
Lorelai: Yes, I'm going to be Ted Nugent.
-Emily, Lorelai

Michel: Well, you know what happens when you assume.
Lorelai: What?
Michel: I don't know. Something about a donkey. It is a stupid American phrase.
-Michel, Lorelai

Lorelai: Face it, Luke. People like you.
Luke: Shut up.
Lorelai: And with charm like that, how could they resist?
-Lorelai, Luke

Michel: (Sookie wants Michel to choose a cookie) I don't care.
Sookie: I just need a quick opinion!
Michel: It took me two seconds to tell you I don't care, that's as quick as I get.
-Michel, Sookie

Rory: You're really gonna just stand there and watch me eating a danish?
Luke: Cable is out and I'm starved for entertainment.
-Rory, Luke

Lorelai: Mom, you signed us up for a couple's massage.
Emily: So?
Lorelai: A couple's massage is for a couple... not a couple of people.
-Lorelai, Emily

Lorelai: I'm going to go make out in the coat room. Don't eat my chicken.
Rory: That's going on your tombstone.
-Lorelai, Rory

Rory: Some people like getting up early.
Lorelai: You lie.
-Lorelai, Rory

Lorelai: Be nice.
Rory: You look like Nancy Reagan.
Lorelai: Oh, now how is that nice?
-Lorelai, Rory

Luke: Get out, Taylor.
Taylor: Why?
Luke: It's just a code I live by.
-Luke, Taylor

Paris: We're friends?
Rory: I'm not sure if there is an exact definition for what we are, but I do think it falls somewhere in the bizarro friends-ish realm.
-Paris, Rory

Luke: I didn't kick you out, you got yourself kicked out.
Jess: Nice spin, you should work for Bush!
-Luke, Jess

Emily: You know, some men retire.
Richard: Yes, and some men tattoo their mother's names on their biceps.
Emily: I don't think the two are necessarily linked.
-Emily, Richard

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