You can't be too careful when it involves underwear
-Kevin McCallister
SUCK BRICK KID!!!!!
-Marv
Give this to Kevin! Give this to Kevin! Give this to Kevin! Give this to Kevin! Give this to Kevin!
Give this to Kevin! Give this to Kevin! Here you go Kevin!
-Kevin
I'm not apologizing to Buzz. I'd rather kiss a toilet seat!
-Kevin McCallister
My tie is in the bathroom and I can't go in because Uncle Frank is taking a shower. He says that if I walked in there and saw him naked I'd grow up never feeling like a real man.
-Kevin McCallister
I'm 10-years-old. TV is my life.
-Kevin McCallister
You can mess with a lot of things, but you can't mess with kids on Christmas.
-Kevin McCallister
That's real smart Marv. You bust outta jail to rob 14 cents from a Santa Claus?!
-Harry
Cop: ...the prisoners have already exchanged Christmas gifts.
Marv: We missed the presents?
-Cop/Marv
Peter: Kevin, you walk out of here and you'll sleep on the third floor.
Fuller: Yeah. With me. *sips Coke*
-Peter/Fuller
I'm down here, you big horse's ass!
-Kevin
-Kevin McCallister
Buzz McCallister: What a troubled young man.
-Buzz McCallister
AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!
-Kevin McCallister
"Where did you get all that money?"
"Ummm... I have a lot of grandmas."
-Mr Duncan/Kevin McAllister
Wouldn't want to spoil your fun Mr. Cheapskate!
-Kevin McCallister
GET OUT OF HERE YOU NOSY LITTLE PERVERT OR I'M GONNA SLAP YOU SILLY!!
-Uncle Frank
Get outta here, you nosy little pervert, or I'm gonna slap you silly!
-Frank
(seeing the hotel bill) "Oh, Daaaad! (bellowing so all New York can hear) "KEVIN! YOU SPENT $967 ON ROOM SERVICE?!!!!"
-Buzz
Guests of the new celebrity Ding-Dang-Dong stay at the world-renowned Plaza Hotel. For reservations, call toll free: 1-800-759-3000.
-Announcer of the Plaza Hotel commercial
Howdy-do? This is Peter McCalister, the FATHER. I'd like a hotel room, please, with an extra-large bed, a TV, and one of those little refrigerators that you have to open with a key. Credit card? You got it!
-Kevin (his voice playing back deeper on his Talkboy)
I never made it to the sixth grade, and it looks like you're not gonna, either.
-Harry
Marv:you wearing aftershave?
Harry: that's not aftershave, its kerosene, the rope's soaked in it.
Marv: that's silly, who'd soak a rope in Kerosene?
-Marv/Harry
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