Hot Tub Time Machine Movie Quotes
Jacob: For your information, I've had a lot of girlfriends. Hot ones.
Lou: You have had lots of boyfriends. Gay ones.
Lou: Who took my f***in' shoe?!
Jacob: Blaine apparently beat your shoe off of you, which -- I don't even know how that could f***in' happen.
Yeah, the taxidermist. The taxidermist is stuffing my mother.
Great White Buffalo!
I'm gonna make a prediction right now: One of us is gonna start writing a novel, and then we all get snowed in, and then Lou's gonna axe-murder all of us.
Here's a question: Was it morally wrong for me to exploit my knowledge of the future for personal financial gain? Perhaps. Here's another question: Do I give a fuck?\
It's called male bonding okay. Haven't you even seen 'Wild Hogs'?
Lou: I love you, Jacob!
Jacob: "Fuck you!"
Lou: Every young man's fantasy is to have a three-way.
Jacob: Yeah not with another fucking guy!
Lou: It's still a three-way!
That's probably Ashton Kolchak right now, tellin' us we've been 'punk'd' or whatever.
Nick: Excuse me Miss, what color is Michael Jackson?
Girl At Bar: black?
I didn't fuckin' try and kill myself! If I wanted to kill myself, I'd fuckin' kill myself. I'd be awesome at it. Shotgun to the dick.
Hey look, it's the douchbag from Karate Kid 3.
-Jacon about Blaine
I wanna fuck something!
I don't like you takin' liberties with my dick.
-Nick to Lou
You're never gonna believe where I'm callin' you from, man. I'm on a mountain, on my phone!
Do I really gotta be the asshole who says we got in this thing and went back in time?
Nobody f***s my mother in the past!
I want an escort to escort our penises into her vagina.
I love how much you hate you.
-Kelly to Lou
God. Relax. It's like you've haven't seen a little cum on your friends face before.
Jacob: Guys! This is scientifically possible.
Lou: "Oh, my god. Okay, Professor Hawking, tell me in your robot voice how this is scientifically possible.
Okay lay down. We got a stupid baby to make.
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