No Strings Attached Movie Quotes
I'm going to start peeing with the door open, it's going to get weird.
I think monogamy goes against our basic biology.
I'll be gone for like, an hour... I'm just getting some... Yogurt.
I'm Emma Kurtzman. You tried to finger me!
Adam, you're wonderful. If you're lucky you're never gonna see me again.
You want to go with me to this stupid thing?
That hole is my bitch!
You look like a pumpkin, bitch!
Wow... it looks like it's coming right at me.
-Emma wearing 3-D glasses
I'm warning you, if you take one step closer, I'm never letting you go.
You eat like a baby dinosaur; you don't even chew.
Don't call my penis cute. Even if it's dressed up as a Care Bear and it's giving you a care stare.
Hey, you can't call me and tell me that you miss me. I don't want to have that conversation on the phone. So you can't text me and you can't e-mail me and you can't write on my wall. Like, if you really miss me, you need to grow up and get in your car and come and see me.
We're sluts, Emma! We're dirty dirty sluts!
Can I say something? And don't take this the wrong way because you know I'll be your friend no matter what. You've been kind of depressing to be around lately and I might start avoiding you in the hallway. Just thought you should know.
God, I am single as fuck.
Ten years from now you're gonna be having sex with your wife. And it's gonna be in the missionary position. And one of you is going to be asleep.
I'm not saying Alvin and I did mushrooms together, but I'm not prepared to say we didn't.
I can't focus on my porn with all this real sex going on around me!
Fuck you, Chuck! You're very talented but fuck you!
Chuck! If I catch you taking pictures of your dick one more time I'm taking that thing away.
You always do this. You always find something wrong with everybody who likes you. And I date guys who have real problems. I date guys who steal my credit card and then they tell me it's my fault because I left it out. You find these perfect guys and then you're like, it will never work he's too happy.
Don't worry, we're all doctors here, so we've seen plenty of penises.
When you're married and you do blow, try to stay away from women who want to fuck you. Even ugly women. Blow is blind, Adam. Blow is blind.
Emma: Take me to Adam's house!
Taxi Driver: Okay, ma'am, where's that?
Emma: Where Adam lives!
-Emma, Taxi Driver
Emma: Congrats? For what, having sex with you?
Adam: You did a good job, so... I thought you deserved a balloon.
Adam: Come on, it's one date. Just do it.
Emma: Why? So I can wear make up and act perfect all night?
Emma: We fell asleep and we were spooning.
Adam: We were?
Emma: Yeah. And we were spooning with our clothes on which is like 10 times worse.
Adam: So, what's up with not calling me back?
Emma: I'm not good at this stuff.
Adam: At what? Talking?
Emma: Yeah, talking. Communicating. Relationship stuff. If we were in a relationship I would become a weird scary version of myself. My throat starts constricting. The walls start throbbing. It's like a peanut allergy, like an emotional peanut allergy.
Adam: Well, I can't date you either. You're not my dad's type.
Adam: You know, I don't want to freak you out, but I'd love to hang out with you in the daytime sometime.
Emma: It's not really possible. I have no time. I work 80 hours a week doing 36-hour shifts. What I need is someone who's going to be in my bed in 2 a.m. who I don't have to lie to or eat breakfast with.
Alvin: How long have you two been together?
Emma: Oh, we're not.
Adam: We're sex friends.
Emma: Yes we are.
Adam: Friends with benefits. Fuck buddies.
Alvin: Great Scott!
Shira: You bringing Adam to the Christmas party tonight?
Emma: No. Things were getting too intense so we decided not to see each other until we hook up with other people.
Shira: Okay. Yes. Good! We are getting laid tonight. This is going to be like Sideways only you're Paul Giamatti and I'm the guy who gets laid.
Emma: I can't get laid?
Shira: No. Tonight is about me, Emma. I'm feeling hot. I'm feeling good. I'm wearing bikini bottoms because my other underwear is dirty. Alright, we're hot. You feel hot?
Emma: No one threw up on me today.
Shira: We're sluts, Emma. We're dirty, dirty sluts!
Shira: Remember, we're sluts!
Emma: Do you wanna do this?
Adam: Do what?
Emma: Use each other for sex, at all hours of the day and night. Nothing else.
Adam: Yeah, I could do that.
Emma: Good. It's gonna be fun.
Eli: You know what the best part about my gay dads is?
Eli: They're never gonna eat out my ex-girlfriends.
Emma: Sometimes, my neck gets sore.
Emma: Because my brain is so big.
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