Funny Quotes About Husbands

Funny Quotes About Husbands

The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they're too old to do it.
-Unknown

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
-Groucho Marx

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside.
-Roseanne Barr

My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn't.
-Unknown

It's a wise husband who will buy his wife such fine china that she won't trust him to wash the dishes.
-Unknown




Funny Quotes About Husbands
Funny Quotes About Men         Funny Quotes About Wives        Marriage Quotes          

Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended.
-Cher

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.
-Ogden Nash

I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night.
-Marie Corelli

Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife clearly understood that they are on the same side.
-Zig Ziglar

I am happy to know that my husband regards me as a woman and a person.
-Katherine Dunham

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
-Jim Carrey

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